Last Ditch Effort

I feel like I have to apologize – I haven’t blogged in five days! Of course, not that many people are reading, and even those who are I doubt they lost sleep over 5 entry-less days from Ben. 🙂

Anyway, the nerves are starting to hit. Thursday will be the end of the two-week wait. I am traveling for business until Thursday afternoon, so the wife won’t be taking THE test until Friday. I have the distraction of traveling, but shes back home with the dog, with those constant reminders. Even without those reminders, though, I am really nervous. Even though we haven’t said it directly, this is the last try before the big IVF.

We started on Follistim in January. The big boy of hormone drugs…well, at least as far as we know so far. Every day, an injection to the belly. Easy for me to say, but these haven’t been too bad. But they definitely have an impact.

In January, we got the bad news: too many eggs. We had to shut it down. I don’t think we have it in us to be reality show parents; he’ll, even twins would be hard enough I think!

We reduced the dosage in February and ended up with one measly mature follicle. Ugh! So that’s why, on the first entry of this blog, I was so happy. Because, like I said, we nailed it. Three follicles this time. On our last shot at IUI.

I’m truly frightened at the prospect of IVF. It’s unknown to me. Many of the wonderful new people I met on Twitter have had their experiences, and it helps to read it. I guess my first concern is my wife’s health. To produce that many follicles…it just seems dangerous. I’d be happy to live my entire life as a proud Uncle to other babies rather than have anything go wrong with my wife. It just isn’t worth it to me to do anything risky health-wise when there are plenty of babies that need homes through adoption. So there’s that.

Second is the almighty dollar. It’s really expensive. I’ve seen plenty of deals that for qualified couples, you get six shots for $20,000 and if you don’t succeed, you get your money back. Based on my research, we’d have a good shot at qualifying. We better. This is really stretching (and exceeding, truthfully) our budget already. I know the money shouldn’t matter, and it won’t if we get the desired end result. But with no sure thing, the money is really daunting. There’s a reason I don’t gamble…I don’t have the stomach for it.

Of course, this is all avoided if we complete the Hail Mary for a touchdown this week. We will be praying, not only for us but for all couples struggling with infertility. We ask for your prayers too.


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